Workplace Psychology: How Do People Like To Be Alone In The Workplace?

Martin Seligman, founder of positive psychology, wrote such an experience in real happiness.

Many years ago, he had the honour to compete with bridge master Bobby Neil.

At that time, the bridge figure was severely disabled because of chronic bone disease, and any action needed help from others.

What impressed Seligman in these years was not the master's game or his weak body. But when he carried Bobby Neil in and out of the car and room, the legendary figure showed the joy of accepting and appreciative of others' help.

Like love, being loved is also an ability, but we often focus on the former and ignore the latter.

Li Ying and Sun Zhenchao entered the operation Department of a company at the same time. After six months, Li Ying became more and more popular in the office. Sun Zhenchao, who was introverted, still felt that he was getting along very well with his colleagues. Until one time the Department went out to eat, he missed out when he was booked. Sun Zhenchao realized the crisis and when he was ignored.

But Li Ying did not feel that his ability was much better than himself. Many times, though he was tired, he could do it all by himself, and Li Ying often needed help from others on some data.

Finally, one day, Sun Zhenchao could not help telling her confusion to Li Ying. Li Ying smiled and said, "sometimes, you have to learn to be loved."

"What?" Sun Zhenchao was muddled.

Li Ying's logic is very simple.

In the unit, introverted Sun Zhenchao always prefers to do things independently. He always feels that he has never been good at interpersonal relationships, and even less willing to owe others. Sometimes colleagues see him in trouble and come to help him. He politely refuses.

Even if someone else asks for help, he will be a businesslike person.

Li Ying is not the same. He feels that he is a new person and lacks the ability to work. Therefore, he has always been pleased with the help of his predecessors, and he has been constantly giving thanks for his kindness.

Because of the more skillful acceptance of help, Li Ying not only successfully completed the task, but also made the people who helped her feel more valuable.

This is probably what Sun Zhenchao never expected.

This kind of insecurity depends on them. They can hardly enjoy the feeling of being loved and distrust others.

Many people believe that "love" is a kind of active effort and hard work.

Being loved is really a wonderful feeling, but if you don't make any subjective efforts, you will have any feelings.

It can't last long.

Those who are good at appreciating and praising can get more love from others, because your positive feedback will enhance the self-esteem and self-worth of the other person.

Psychological research shows that this appreciation and praise can slowly convince the other person that they are the outstanding people we believe in, and that as time goes by, they can enhance their sense of satisfaction, trust and help to maintain a more lasting relationship.

Similarly, when the other party has done something for us, we should give each other proper feedback.

In fact, there are many people like Sun Zhenchao, who are not only in advance of the closure of help, but also an escape from a workplace relationship. Usually these people are introverted, sensitive and figuratively speaking, they are more likely to switch to workplace autism.

Because of the fast pace of work and life in modern society, many people suffer from "autism" phenomenon in the workplace due to environmental and pressure reasons.

Its main performance is: usually alone, do not like to communicate with others, just like a person to head back to stay, whenever any social occasions feel awkward.

Because they are not good at words or too low key, they are easily marginalized by their colleagues. They are also struggling with communication and communication with their leaders. It is even more difficult for them to interact with their customers.

Zhang Fang was a top student when he was in University. In his opinion, fate can only be grasped by itself.

Only by studying hard and having good grades can he stay in a big city and not go back to his hometown.

After work, he is still used to working alone, and he likes to carry himself down with problems and difficulties and never turn to others.

With colleagues, words are like words, and time has grown into an office "marginal man". No one has talked with him, he has no share in his activities, and jokes are always stuck.

Even with his colleagues, he is embarrassed to meet leaders.

Sometimes the leader will ask him what difficulties he has. He really has difficulties, but when he says it, he can't talk about it. He always finds it troublesome.

Over time, the leaders were seen waiting in the elevator hall for the elevator.

Normally, Zhang will not step into the leadership office unless he has to.

"This is actually an escape from workplace relations."

Psychologist Dr Luo Hong said that people with "workplace autism" are usually introverted, sensitive, and afraid of making mistakes in their interactions with colleagues and leaders, so they hold the attitude of "trying to hide".

In fact, people with "workplace autism" are very contradictory. They are not unwilling to communicate with others. Instead, they are very concerned about other people's eyes and care about others' evaluation. Their biggest trouble is the lack of communication and fear of wrong statements.

However, this temporary escape can not solve the problem, instead, it will isolate itself from the workplace world and form a vicious circle of interpersonal and workplace relationships.

Find a quiet place, adjust your breathing and sitting posture, and gradually calm down.

Then use progressive relaxation to relax from head to toe.

A thorough relaxation can open the subconscious mind, integrate your mind and body with nature, and experience the calm and serenity of your mind, and relax your feelings after letting down all the fetters.

When you find yourself beginning to have "

When you are inclined, you need to have a closer look at why you have such a situation.

Awareness is the first step in change.

Is it too much pressure for yourself to look at yourself, or is there a feeling of inferiority in the heart, or is there a little dissatisfaction with the work? And then do some processing and adjustment.

Everyone has his own goal in mind.

In a state of vague goals, it is difficult to tell the specific internal needs. Some people end their lives in the concept of "pushing away" and "letting nature take their course". Until death do not know what their real needs are, so identifying their wishes is a very important lesson.

From a psychological point of view, the external environment is not the source of pressure, the real pressure source is the result of interaction between individual irrational desire and outside world.

Many people's negative labels are posted in their growth environment, and they will be considered to be true for a long time.

Amend the stickers and the early relationship pattern, in a relaxed situation.

Ask your colleagues for help and help them understand your gratitude. If you still have the strength to spare, let your colleagues know that they are important to you.

No one will feel that a genuine trust is a trouble.

After modifying the relational schema,

The ability to build up slowly.

In the final analysis, a lot of closure stems from the lack of confidence in oneself.

It is impossible for a person to completely identify himself in his career. If a job is not suitable for him, then he can find the most suitable one for himself.

If we realize what is lacking, we should try to supplement it.

Do not avoid the lack of self, nor are you sensitive enough to locate your own weaknesses.

There is no strict standard of communication in the workplace. A confident person can influence others in his own way.

People who are self closed always habitually avoid relationships with people around them. Even if they are well intentioned, they can not accept them freely.

In fact, this feeling in the workplace can be slowly adjusted.